dancing horses

dancing horses

Saturday, June 4, 2016

Calmer Now

I am feeling calmer after my mini breakdown yesterday.

First of all I want to thank everyone who commented on the blog, on FB and sent me private messages. I was overwhelmed with the support. A lot pointed out that Carmen is a strong willed Iberian mare and she will test me.

gratuitous vacation pic showing a rock balancing precariously on
a cliff - which completely describes my mood right now
I know that my call to withdraw from the show right after the ride yesterday may have sounded impulsive. But she's so inconsistent at this point that it makes no sense. I believe that taking the $500 that the show would have cost (between entries, hotels, food etc) and invest it in a trainer makes far more sense and will help me more in the long run. I had cut down on her Quiescence (as per the instructions) but have put it back up to see if that is playing a role. If it seems to be that I will check the food store to get some Mag Oxide because the prepared Magnesium supplements are expensive.

I realize that part of my breakdown relates back to Steele. I had plans that we were going to show last year and that didn't happen because Carmen needed training. I thought that I was okay with that but I realized that I wouldn't be showing this year it hit me hard. Harder than I expected. It hadn't helped that I recently resumed having the recurring nightmare of horses getting out of the field and running away (I've had this since he died). I'd also been dreaming of my mother. It would seem that I have some emotional issues to work through.....

I spoke to Royce yesterday and gave him he rundown on what's been going on. He's going to come and see 'what I'm dealing with' and then we will make a plan. I like plans. And I'm not afraid of hard work.

Maybe I've been too careful. Who knows? We shall see what happens. The idea of selling her breaks my heart so that will not be an easy decision.


that face. 

16 comments:

  1. I'm just catching up...I'm sorry you are having troubles. So many of us go through this with horses we love, but struggle to work with. I have been in this exact position a couple of times and, for me, the hardest thing was figuring out that it was OK to let go. We put such expectations on ourselves and our horses.

    I think you have a good plan. Having someone else, who you trust, work with Carmen may be just what she needs. It will take her out of her comfort zone where she will have to learn to cope. If she can't, than selling her to someone who won't mind her antics is a perfectly reasonable thing to do, for you and for her. Hopefully, it won't come to that and you will be able to work through this, but don't beat yourself up about it either. This is supposed to be fun right?:)

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  2. If the MagOx doesn't help, you might check out MagRestore (https://shop.performanceequinenutrition.com/magrestore-p45.aspx) -- I have several friends who swear by that when MagOx didn't do quite enough. They offer a 45 day trial that is less expensive, so you don't have to buy a huge amount -- they also have another product called Focus Equine that is marketed to help anxious/excitable horses.

    My strong-willed Iberian mare (haha) is currently on organic raspberry leaves (cheaper version of Mare Magic) and AniMed Remission. My girl tends to be a VERY easy keeper and is very cresty -- the Remission is for laminitic and pre-laminitic horses, but can also be successful at reducing crestiness. Since one of the main ingredients is magnesium, I don't supplement additional magnesium (although I keep waffling about trying the MagRestore).

    I know you do a LOT of groundwork with Carmen. Have you ever ground driven her? When I wanted to get my girl used to the trails at the boarding barn, I started by hand-walking her down them. A few weeks later I started ground driving her down them. By the time I started riding her on them, she was totally unconcerned.

    I don't blame you for not wanting to "waste" $500 when things are so inconsistent. Hopefully Royce will have some insight. I'm sure you guys will be back on track in no time!

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    1. Thank you for the advice. I don't think I can get Mag restore here

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  3. Plans are always a good thing. :) My sense is that you have been firm but fair with Carmen and that is the only way to have a successful partnership with a mare. She won't mind firm as long as you are fair -- but lose that and watch out.

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  4. Oh no. I hope reading my post about the Pit Bulls didn't trigger your latest nightmares. I warned you not to read it. The good news is that those dogs have not returned. I've used a lot of calming supplements and Mare Magic, but haven't seen any change in Gabbrielle. It was interesting to read that others have had better results, so apparently, just because some products don't work for me and my horses does not mean they don't work for all people and all horses. Everything is worth a try, but don't go bankrupt in the process.

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    1. I do t think so. They come every now and then.

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  5. I was wondering if emotions attached to the loss of Steele might be playing into the mix... Training over showing is a sound decision. :D

    Here is a link to the magnesium citrate I give Val.

    It's very affordable ($4 - $5 a month) and has kept him, a single horse surrounded by spooky woods, (mostly) super calm in the five years I've had him on it. Citrate is supposedly the most bio-available form. Feel free to email me if you want any more info - dosage etc. xianleigh (at) earthlink (dot) net.



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    1. Thanks for the link. I will see if I can get it in Canada

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    2. Looks like they ship to Canada + they pay fees and import duties :D

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  6. I have those same feelings of frustration that are tied to missing and Bodhi and comparing my two now to him.. which is unfair because he was one of a kind. I think spending the money on the trainer is a good move.

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    1. One of the reasons I bought Carmen was because she was so different then Steele. I didn't want to spend my time comparing. But i still miss him. Every day.

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    2. I know how you feel. Both of mine are very different too, but it is hard not to think things like "this time last year we were riding at a hunter pace" and comparing that to now. It is just hard, and I feel you.

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  7. Money spent on training sounds like a wise choice! Finding a supplement that works for your mare that is safe to be kept on a maintenance daily dose may be key to getting you through while working on her training and putting in the time it takes to become her ever-trusted leader.

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  8. Several of my friends have lost their heart horses this year to various circumstances, bUT also tragic. One, just yesterday. It's hard to move forward with a new horse, even if the new one is different. I'm a simple trail rider and I try to avoid clinics and competitions, so of course I'm going to vote for private instruction every time. That one to one with a teacher nearby is invaluable and you need lots of positive moments to build the relationship with Carmen that you're seeking. Do you have the ability to ride trails with her? A long ride in the country is good for your soul and your horse's soul, too.

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