She's been quite difficult to ride and we've had a few 'come to jesus' moments.
It's not been fun.
As always, with horses it's a struggle to figure out if something is physical or behavioural. I began her on ulcer meds but it really didn't seem to make a difference.
I won't bore you with details of all my rides. Roughly they consist of good moments with bits that are total shit shows: retracted neck, tight body often followed by a spin and bolt. Or balking with threats to run backwards or go up. Note: Carmen has never reared on me. She has felt light in front and I've reached forward and bopped her on her poll which put the end to that.
After a particularly frustrating ride I was pretty bummed. I did some deep thinking and I realized that I was giving Carmen power over my emotions. I wouldn't let anyone else dictate my feelings in that way. I knew that I couldn't let that continue or else we would continue in our downward spiral. Also, there has also been lots of good things in our training and I can't just focus on the negative (which is totally against my goals).
I took a step back and began to spend some time grooming her. She responded well to that so there may be a bit of pressure related. It is possible that I was focussing too much on work and not enough on relationship stuff.
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| the weather is getting warm so I braid her mane to help keep her cool |
Shanea wanted me to try lunging her in side reins. I had been resistant because it's easy to teach a horse to lean. But what she wanted to do was to get Carmen to learn to reach for the bit without a person on her back. I tried it during a lesson so that Shanea could help me. What we realized was that as soon as the side reins went on Carmen became tight and defensive. Which makes me wonder if she had them in the past. However, we kept them quite long and with some work she began to reach for the bit.
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| in side reins- see the umbrella? Shanea brought it for sun shade and it caused a kerfuffle. So we did some work with it. |
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| within 5 minutes she went from bolting to being bored with the whole thing. That is one thing I know how to do with her. |
The lesson was useful because Shanea was able to see the groundwork I do and how calm Carmen is before I get on. At a spot that was perfectly fine on the ground she flatly refused to go by. I had to get quite harsh with her - pressure on until I felt her think forward and then take it off.
I tried it again today and she started the same. This time I loosened the side reins even more and she began to stretch and reach for the bit. It got me wondering if Carmen really has a good understanding of contact. Which is stupid to be wondering at this point in her training I realize but hey, better late than never.
My ride today was also really good. She had one bobble at the same spot as yesterday but i gave her a squeeze and a tap and she went forward and that was the end of it. The ride was really good and every time she retracted her neck I kept the reins out there and put my leg on (or gave her a kick) to send her to the bit. My defence mechanisms tend to kick in when she gets tight because I'm anticipating a bolt and want to stop it. One day I might be over that tendency.
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| it was so hot yesterday. But I love this movement- she's so light in front (in a good way) |
I still don't know if we're getting through this bobble or it's just a temporary truce. But I feel better about things. To quote John Legend:
"What's going on in that beautiful mind?
I'm on your magical mystery ride
And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me
But I'll be alright
And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me
But I'll be alright
My head's under water
But I'm breathing fine
You're crazy, and I'm out of my mind
How's your summer going?
But I'm breathing fine
You're crazy, and I'm out of my mind
Cut yourself and Carmen some slack. It has been an insane year and some of that tension has got to be seeping through. Shows are mostly cancelled so maybe take the summer off from training and just do fun stuff. You might end up learning and teaching more that way.
ReplyDeleteHonest, I’m trying to keep it light and fun. But your point is well taken. ☺️
DeleteI've basically written off this entire year. I'm doing bareback trail rides and swimming in the pond with the horses. I even went to a schooling even having ridden about 20 times all year. Haven't had a lesson since the fall. Didn't care. It went fine. I dunno, I guess "just give up" isn't great advice, but if you have no ambitions and nothing matters, then bad rides don't effect you.
ReplyDeleteLol, that is a perspective I hadn’t thought about. Also, wanting to hear more about the training show......
DeleteFirst, no one is going to think you suck. Knock it off. We admire you for sticking with this mare who can be quite, ahem, challenging at times. You do not suck. You are honest. And awesome. Second, have you tried working her in a Pessoa? I’m not a fan of side reins either but the Pessoa is a great way to teach them to reach for the bit and work from behind. It did amazing things with Lucy — got her to stretch and engage without me interfering on her back. Give it a thought. My summer? It’s hot here as well so I’m wimping out and not riding. ...hiding in the house with a book or my paintbrushes mostly.
ReplyDeleteOk, I’ll knock it off. I promise. ☺️ I hadn’t thought about the Pessoa system. I’ll do some research.
DeleteI'm glad you feel safe enough to be so honest. I struggle with this. My 2 cents is to go for the Chambon, because it's the only tool I know that allows a horse to stretch not only down but forward with its nose. Here is the video that sold me on this tool: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tgvd84mIyC8
DeleteI, too, just started wondering if my horse understands contact after owning him for 9 years. Don't be so hard on yourself. Carmen is tricky in a way that's teaching you an enormous amount, and horses don't have timelines (and for real though, no one has timelines in 2020!) Progressing as a horseman is more important than anything else.
ReplyDeleteYou advice is solid. thank you.
DeleteDefinitely you are being too hard on yourself, its a wacky/not normal year and there is a lot of pressure internally in us all because of it.
ReplyDeleteI am sure that I'm not alone in being hard on myself. :P.
Delete2020 is a whackamo year. I wouldn't read too much into any of it. None of us are in good spaces, even if we think we are, and who knows how that is transferred to our horses. I haven't ridden in a couple of weeks--besides riding Tumbleweed for the first time. I've been in a funk, and I didn't care to fight it. I just enjoyed boating and other past times, and watching my horses from my deck with a glass of wine--or doing the Masterson Method on them. I'm working with a certified practitioner now and I find that work very rewarding. So do the horses.
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like a good way to spend time. I'm on vacation next week so I plan to spend a lot of time just relaxing.
DeleteSometimes I think you two pick up on each other's emotions still, but that you have come a long way since you started to work with her. You have a gorgeous horse, love those plaits, and this should be a fun activity as well as a learning experience for both of you.
ReplyDeleteI am sure you are right about us picking up on our emotions.
DeleteI also have a mare who is "Pay to Play" : the more time I spend grooming/spa days the better behaved she is. I tried some German lauffer (sliding) side reins: Tesla responded really well to those....also, that umbrella work looks like a good idea. I think you are doing a FAB job with Carmen, and she is a lucky girl to have you :D
ReplyDeleteHmm, I should check out the sliding reins. they might be more forgiving than side reins.
Delete1. Nobody thinks you suck ;) and 2. That does sound so frustrating, ugh horses are so sensitive and complicated sometimes. Seems like your step back to break things into components to better understand is a good approach tho. I always think of what the horsemanship guy who helped me get Charlie started said about the peaks and valleys of horse training. Usually a valley precedes a breakthrough, even if it’s hard to believe in that moment
ReplyDelete1. thank you :) <3 and 2. it is frustrating. and it's more frustrating that frustration is not a good response...
DeleteAgree with everyone above who has stated all I wanted to write and more. Go easy on yourself. It's a hard time. <3
ReplyDeletethank you my friend. :) <3
DeleteDon't be so hard on yourself! No other advice but sending support. I have less than great horse stuff going on but I'm not up to blogging about it. Feel free to message me if you wish.
ReplyDeleteoh I am sorry that things are not going well!
Delete<3
ReplyDeleteHugs.
Set backs are not fun, and I echo sentiments of other posters - be gentle with yourself. This year has been a ferocious beast.
It has been a terrible year for many of us. I hope that you are doing better.
DeleteBe easy on yourself and Carmen. The vibes this year are all sorts of off and you two have been working really hard all year. You know Carmen best and you handle her so intuitively. You'll get back on the same page soon. Until then , enjoy spa days, play days and life in general.
ReplyDeleteGood advice. I might be giving it back to you soon. :)
DeleteNo one here would ever think you suck! You're doing an incredible job with Carmen! Bridget and I used to go back and discuss the contact thing often...she couldn't possibly hold her own self up some days, then others behind the leg giraffe mode was worth a try again. Sometimes that meant a few truly awful rides before it all came together again. I know we've all been there!
ReplyDeleteI know that I'm not alone but it's good to hear it. I'm hoping that we can get back on the same page again.
DeleteI think you guys have made a ridiculous amount of progress lately. I know you can't see it because you are too close and see each day's progress rather than the whole picture. But I think taking a step back and finding things that make both of you happy is important right now. If that means some grooming sessions, great! If that means fixing some training issues, great! You guys are becoming an amazing, solid partnership.
ReplyDeleteTaking a step back makes a lot of sense. You are right, we have made a lot of progress.
DeleteI appreciate your honesty. It happens. We don't all ride perfect horses. Sometimes it seems that it is what we put out on the internet, but heck, I have a nine year old that is still riding at training level.
ReplyDeleteBut I agree. Sometimes it's hard not to be tense and reactive when riding a horse that is prone to getting tense and misbehaving. Story of my life. To be honest, I appreciate lessons now where I know someone will be there if I die and someone to talk me through situations. I personally find I am not as tense, especially if the coach can keep me busy.
Go figure. As soon as I put my horse into more busy work like shoulders in and ten meter circles, the less stupid she gets into.
Best of luck. I feel you and appreciate your honestly. It's not always sunshine and rainbows and especially this year!
You are right, it's not always sunshine and rainbows. Thank you for sharing your journey as well.
DeleteOh goodness, I don't think anyone here would think you suck! Horses are horses. Some days (weeks? Months?) they leave their brains in their stalls and we have to find them and reinstall. Whatever the reason, I'm confident you're working through it. You'll have your horse back in no time. I'm sure.
ReplyDeleteHey there, Ive been thinking of you. I remember seeing a Tristan Tucker video a while back about a very similar issue. I spent a bit of time trying to find it again ... and here it is: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSzzjUYnZZk
ReplyDeleteAt the 13 minute mark he talks about creating a yoga pattern to release tension during the warm up. It essentially mimics some of the groundwork patterns he creates, but under saddle.
I have found a similar pattern (repeated teardrop patterns on a loose rein) to be very effective when my horse gets spooky at the back arena door. It also helps me focus on the bend and crossing of the legs and less on the possibility of a big spook reaction.
Also, but perhaps not all during the same session, you could enlist your riding friend or coach to be "the Tristan" during your riding by waving flags and creating all those distractions you worked so hard at in your groundwork in the area of the arena that seems to be creating the tension. That might also translate the tension-relax cycle to the saddle that you have mastered on the ground.
As Tristan says: the quicker you release, the quicker your horse will give you more. By creating a new pattern under saddle you could allow Carmen a release in an area of the arena where she clearly has much tension.
You got this!
Thanks. I have done this pattern. To be honest- sometimes it seems like it just builds up more tension then releases it. Maybe I need a personal appt with him. That said, we spend a lot of time at the beginning doing things to just create relaxation and suppleness. sometimes it takes 10 minutes and other times 45. I don't actually give up but sometimes am tempted.
DeleteI think it was Buck Brannaman who came up with the "short serpentine" exercise, which teaches body and leg control under saddle. My YouTube search showed a lot of other trainers doing this as well. I believe my horse would react like Carmen, "This torture is pointless!"
DeleteWe definitely don't think you suck, and some degree of back sliding is completely normal in any equine relationship... even with a much easier horse than Carmen. I'm sorry things have been difficult on top of everything else, but it sounds like you're doing a fabulous job addressing it, as usual. <3 And her tail is gorgeous even if she's not being 100% compliant ;)
ReplyDeleteOh that tail. It is beautiful but can get pretty tangled...
DeleteAgreed - I do not think that you suck! Makes sense to have ups and downs in life and riding and such.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry that you and Carmen are having some issues at the moment, but I'm sure your careful approach will help you sort through it.
As for my 2020? I say pfffbbbtttttt. Lol
I am ready for 2020 to be done.
DeleteI'm not a huge fan of lunging either, but two trainers I respect both recommended it to me weeks apart last spring, so I've been doing it about once a week.
ReplyDeleteAnd if it makes you feel better, we just went through about a week long patch where Cupid was a bit more distracted then usual (not doing anything bad, but we just weren't getting our best work), so we're doing a course of ulcer meds but I also talked to me trainer and she said she was feeling the same with one of her horses so maybe it's just something in the air! I'm sure there's sensing a lot of change and just more people around them being on edge?
Yes it definitely could be that the horses are picking up on 2020 vibes.
Delete