dancing horses

dancing horses

Friday, February 9, 2018

The Big Meanie


Hi Everyone, Guinness here.

Mom said that I could do a post and so I want to share with you how mean she can be sometimes.

You see I love sticks. Like, I REALLY love sticks.

mom's friend, Cynthia throwing a stick for me. 
It's silly but mom says that I go after sticks too hard sometimes so I might get hurt if I'm not careful.

I mean, really. I'm a dog. What does careful even mean?

careful is for sissies. 
But Dad went and bought this stick that is 'safe'. 

I love my new stick. 
Mom shrugged and said 'that won't last'.  And then she made it that I could only have it when we went on our walks. That made me really want the stick. I was a dog obsessed. 

Today I had my chance. I managed to work my big brown eyes and convince mom to let me have it when she went out to do 'barn chores'. Now I don't really understand the point of 'barn chores'. Mostly it seems to me to be all about moving horse poo from one place to another. But it gets me outside and it seems to make her happy. 

I was so happy to have my stick and I showed my love in the traditional way of chewing. 

But I might have gone too far though and she took it away from me and put it on her green machine. 

um, what just happened? 

I tried the big brown eyes. They usually make her melt. 

pleeease, I'll be good. I promise. Just look at my face.
(you can see my sick by the big wheel)


She just said 'leave it alone'

but but but that's my stick
I couldn't believe that she could be so mean. It's not like I was going to swallow those pieces. (well not many of them anyway). 

I tried to get Ripley's help. She's pretty good at stealing stuff, I figured she could get it for me. 
hmm, she put it up here?
yes! Quick get it for me
 But she said that it wasn't worth it.

It was worth it to me.
Ripley going back to hunting stupid squirrels. 

so close and yet so far
I had to give up. Mom was being really really unreasonable about it. 

Fortunately I live in the land of sticks. 


Which just goes to show that you can't keep a good dog down. 

Not for long anyway. 


42 comments:

  1. poor suffering Guinness!! how anyone could stand up to those big brown puppy dog eyes is beyond me!! ;)

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    1. It's really really hard. But then I picture a big vet bill and my resolve hardens

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  2. Poor Guinness! So mistreated. Nikita and Ginger have the same problem with their mean mom. And they’re sick and tired of hearing “ it’s for your own good!”

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    1. These poor puppies suffer so much in the name of love.

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  3. Ha ha! Now that I think about it, dogs do prefer toys that are not at their disposal. We found a lost dog ball under our china cabinet once. I wiped the dust off and tossed it to Stewie. Now he passes up every toy in the house to get to that ball since it was missing for so long. Finding old toys is better than getting a new toy, because they come complete with old dog scents.

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  4. Poor guy! One of my lil' dachshunds could commiserate with him. I always have to take away his ball so he will actually, you know, drink water, and not die. He just thinks I'm a giant meanie who doesn't let him have any fun. Which is also probably true.

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    1. well in your defence it's hard to have fun when you're dead. But dogs have their own logic.

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  5. Poor Guinness!!! Marble understands! She's not allowed to bring her toys outside with her. She doesn't chew them anymore, just carries them around, but sometimes she'll forget and leave someone outside. So outside she has to carry around pine cones. And she gets upset that she can't bring those inside. Where she WILL chew them and make a mess...

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    Replies
    1. We have toys that are lost and found all the times in the woods.

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  6. Hey Guinness, Connor here...I feel your pain friend. My mom is sooooo mean. She actually tried to take my frisbee away, she says I'm too obsessed and gonna get hurt and I'm making her crazy. I showed her though. She took the frisbee away so I went and found the JollyBall. She tried to hide that so I went and stole the ball off the old dog's grave. Like he needs it anymore right?

    She took that away so I went and found where she hid the frisbee in the closet. She didn't think I could reach it, but I showed her. Actually, I did it when her back was turned so she wouldn't see how I did it, you can't let them learn your secrets. She tried leaving the grail on top of the refrigerator, but I spent every waking moment eiter fixated on it or bringing her other "toys". When I brought her a rock she finally realized that she can't win and gave it back.

    These humans are hard to train, but keep at it brother. Eventually they get it. They can try, but they can't keep us good dogs down.

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    1. Hi Connor, Wow, she took your frisbee???! That's harsh. I'm glad you were able to show her the error of her ways. Smart dogs unite! ~ Guinness~

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  7. Poor Guinness, living such an abused life.

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  8. We have a malinios mix that feels that way about our little black kitten (she's about 3 lbs and 12 years old.) Talk about focus. She has several balls that she carries around in her mouth (better than the kitten) all the time.

    Neither of our dogs eat what they chew, with the exception of corn cobs. They will eat those and then regurgitate them at the most inopportune moment.

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    Replies
    1. I don't think G eats too much of what he chews but he's still young.

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  9. Awwww Guinness 😍 I would give you all the sticks in the world.

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  10. Awww, tough love moment. But better to be safe than sorry!

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  11. Oh Guinness, my Shepherd is shaking his head right along with you!! He says "be patient, you'll win her over and get to do whatever you want" ahhaha.

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    1. Guinness says "I don't know, she seems to be really slow"

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  12. He's adorable. It's a good thing he's safe with you, my willpower wouldn't stand up to him :)

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  13. Looking GOOD Guinness!! Keep up the good work, and don't let anyone push you around! I KNOW your border collie brother could figure out how to get that stick for you!!

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    Replies
    1. He probably could but he likes to pretend he's above such things.

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  14. Gorgeous dog. In another universe, I have a house full of GSDs.

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  15. Herbie and Julio would really like one of those sticks. But I don't think it would last long either...

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  16. Hahaha! Man I love Guinness! He's such a character.

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  17. You realise a handsome chap like Guiness (and so articulate!) could become even more famous than Grumpy Cat.

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    Replies
    1. Lol. I won’t tell him that. It will go to his head!

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  18. Oh man, I have a Shepherd. All the sticks. ALL OF THE STICKS. You've never seen a happier dog than one that got a stick after not having a stick for a week. Cut up wooden shovel handles work well as sticks, fyi. At least they do for us.

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    Replies
    1. It really is ALL THE STICKS ALL THE TIME. The handle idea is a good one

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  19. Saint the Shepherd is also obsessed with sticks. BIG sticks are her favourite - I'm not kidding, like, firewood big. I once saw her dig a young tree out of the ground, it took work, but she really wanted that 7 foot stick. Then she got hooked up trying to get it through the electric fence. She kept angling it til she could get it through, and has never stopped with the giant sticks. She can amuse herself for hours on end; her favourite thing is to wedge one end of the stick between her collar and shoulder blade and then run around plowing furrow in the ground with one paw hooked over the stick to direct her furrow. She's a hoot. 11+ years old and never had an issue with the sticks, and she has chewed many a stick into splinters. We used to try and take them away from her at first - lost cause. Farm dog does what farm dog wants to do, and our farm dog wants to play with sticks.

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    1. Fortunately he has not yet tried to root up trees! I need a video of the plowing! I don't mind so much the chewing but I worry that as he runs full bore he will impale himself! Silly I'm sure.

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